“Every woman that finally figured out her worth, has picked up her suitcases of pride and boarded a flight to freedom, which landed in the valley of change.”
Shannon L. Alder

What is a Preface. The preface is that one or two pages found at the beginning of a book. It's the part of the book that, most if not all the time, I tend to skip over. However; to the avid, seasoned, reader, the preface holds the insights into the rest of the story. But to give a proper definition of this word let's see what the Merriam-Webster online dictionary says;

Preface: an introduction to a book or speech or the introductory remarks of a speaker or author.

Though I don't think I've ever seen a blog starting off with a preface, for this particular subject matter, I will begin my blogging this week with a preface.

The purpose of my blog is not to offend, though I am sure it might offend a few. It is not meant to cause hurt feelings, but again I am certain it will. And it's not meant to anger anyone, although it most likely will. No; my greatest desire in all of this, is to let others know who have walked or who are walking in the same shoes that I have walked in, that they can know the loving, healing hand of God grace.

Too often when folks have come through spiritually abusive churches, when they find the courage to leave, there is a huge struggle that follows in figuring out where they fit in and where to go from this point. Often times during the course of their time within the walls of a spiritually abusive church system, where they have been taught, as I was, to go any where else is dooming ones soul to everlasting hell, is often difficult to get past. So what happens?  From my observations, and was also a consideration of my own, is they opt to go no where and then they find themselves so far removed from God, that sometimes they begin to believe the enemy's lie, that there is no God. That when life happens, it's somehow because they have left the church. Somehow through the indoctrination that they, I, have heard, God only exist within the four walls of a particular church. Only "they" have the corner on truth. This leaves the abused soul confused and vulnerable to the devils plans to kill and destroy. After all; isn't that his plan? Be careful—watch out for attacks from Satan, your great enemy. He prowls around like a hungry, roaring lion, looking for some victim to tear apart.{1 Peter 5:8 TLB} We are living so close to the return of Jesus Christ, closer than any generation before us, and there are sooooo many spiritually abused souls trapped within themselves, now caught within a worldview of indoctrination, that they don't know where to turn. Behold, I go forward, but he is not there; and backward, but I cannot perceive him: {Job 23:8 NASB} But what they do sense is that they need to find away back into relationship with Jesus Christ. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. {Jeremiah 29:13 NASB}

My other goal too here, is to try and show those who may never have been raised or spent any amount of time in an abusive church to see how over time, with repetition of dogma, how folks can just blindly repeat and come to believe what is being said is some how true.

In recent weeks there has been media coverage of those who have been quoted as saying for example; that another Christian from another denomination who has passed away is not saved based on the fact that they did not have the "truth" according to a particular church's dogma. Some of the comments to this person, was one of outrage and disbelief. But after being in this persons shoes while on the other side, I can sympathies, because I know that this person is as much of a victim as those who have left and are speaking out. And let me add; that while a person is still trapped within that system, you cannot get them to see reason. Oh they may get to a point after a while where they may start to question, but at the same time, they know not to question, and you will see that as I continue to blog my story.

Lastly; to every good story there is always a beginning, and to fully understand how one can be so blind and just accept what is being said, you have to go back to that beginning. I was considered a third generation Pentecostal, so for me, before I came into this world I was going to church. It's ways, it's rules, it's dogmas, is all I ever knew. I thank God every day for the Christian heritage that I was given. But the dogmas of the particular Pentecostal church I grew up in messed me up so to speak and I had to find out for myself just who I was and who I was in Christ. But I thank God for my Christian home because it was there that I learned to love God with all my heart. It was there that a desire grew to always want to serve the Lord. It was there that a love was developed for the never changing Word of God. And always to every good story there is an ending.

I was thinking the other day that for those of us who have experienced any form of abuse and then begin the process of healing you will know when your wounds have healed. Your open wounds have to scab over and then with time these scabs turn into scares. When you know you are healed is when you can talk about your past, when you can react to other peoples opinions or statements and not take it to heart. If you find that you are still stung by remarks then you know the scabs have yet to turn into scares.

There is a chours that says;

He that the Son hath set free, is free indeed 
No more chains of slavery 
Truth has triumphed, in liberty 
He that the Son hath set free, is free indeed 

And John 8:36 {AKJV} says;

If the Son therefore shall make you free, you shall be free indeed.

That is my prayer for those who will read these blogs; to know they are not alone; to know that healing can be found; to know that God still loves them and longs to have a relationship with them; to know that God's Presence does not end once you walk away from an abusive controlling church; to know that you can find another place to worship and find fellowship with godly believers who will love you as Christ loves the church; and lastly to know that....we are silent voices no more.  


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